Why WORRY when you can PRAY?

Fine. I failed to attend mass for two straight weeks now. Add to that, I think i'm on the verge of spiritual death made worse by the fact that I'm really just relying on CYA and YFC to somehow try to revive me. And don't get me wrong, God has been proving to me these past few months that only He is my happiness - I've been so dead lonely and sad for no reason at all, feeling so defeated and unfulfilled, these past few months. And yes, this has aggravated my desire to actually rejuvenate myself and bring me back to that 4th-year-high-school version of me that spreads his arms wide open for Him (and this makes me miss Pisay and my batch sooo much). But see, doing so is starting to become more challenging too. After all, college life had brougt more things to think about, stealing away priorities and destroying daily schedules. There's just so much to do in so little time that I so regret not putting my faith in stronger foundations prior to college and all this "busy-ness."

More often than not, I find myself envious of Pito reading his Christian books at the dorm and guilty whenever he plays praise songs from his laptop as our background music as we study taxonomy and comparative anatomy.

But you know what, God knows it's my birthday soon. And probably He too knows that I'm also in a position wherein I still have a lot to face (come on, face it, we're yet in our fifth week of school but ALL of us are already tired with the demands of our academic life alone, not to mention our extra-curricular activities in the college and in the university) and a lot to be tired for. I bet He knows that I'm soon to face my worst worries and that I tend to falter and give up whenever I worry.

So, He gave me a gift. And He did even after my two weeks of not attending mass and my being the worst son ever for the past months. (God, why do you always make me feel guilty? You know I don't deserve it.)

The priest at the mass a while ago gave a good sermon, which was very unexpected since a lot of priests nowadays do not give such heartfelt sermons that can help both spiritual and practical. He recalled how he often worries and feels defeated by the changes that come into his life. And he shared that after all of the things he does just to take away the depressions that he feels, only one often proves to be most effective: prayer. And I guess, from now on, I would often pray. :)

Oh and he shared how deaf people tries to escape from the world whenever they want to just stop talking to other people (they use sign language, remember) or just stop worrying even for a while: they close their eyes. And in doing so, they see more of themselves. :)